How to love your body a bit more…

I’ve been thinking a lot about weight this week. I’m currently reading Martin Amis’ autobiography and I stopped to think when he talked about his father’s descent, or rather expansion, into corpulence in later life as a conscious decision made as an acceptance of his disconnection with his sexual life. That to comfort eat and […]

How to draw summer to a close….

‘They’ll all come off at the end of September’ I’d said to a friend as we sat in my back garden in June, when the autumn seemed like it would never arrive. In the lime-green freshness of early summer the idea that everything will turn golden and die always seems inconceivable. But everything has its […]

How to go to your first festival…

Firstly, buy a tent. In an ideal world erect tent before you go so you know what you’re up against. But hey, in my new-found spirit of abandon and winging it I decided to just rock up and see what occurred. The same went for a camp cooker and an air bed. I’ve spent so […]

How to have your heart broken…

They say that the break-up of your first relationship after your marriage hurts the most, and they are right… They…. A few months ago I had my heart broken. I’ve healed now, but the anguish I felt at the time I wrote about in my journal, to process the hurt, and these were my thoughts: […]

How to see things from a different perspective….

Since moving here my son has discovered an aptitude for climbing out of my bedroom window and sitting on the apex of the kitchen roof below. Probably not his best trick or my finest parenting hour, but I admire his confidence in his agility and his freedom. So I don’t stop him from doing it. […]

How to reclaim single status

‘Don’t worry you won’t be on your own for long,’ a well-meaning male colleague said not long after my marital break-up. As though I only have value in terms of my worth to a man. I was in a state of single doom, not singledom in his eyes. He pursed his lips and looked sad. […]

How to learn the meaning of home….

Home is not a place. It’s a feeling. A white light flashed on my phone. In my eagerness to hear from a particular someone I picked it up to read the text. The disappointment was crashing; the message wasn’t from the long-awaited contact, but a friend telling me she won’t be in work today. Rather […]

How to find love in other ways…

I had my heart broken earlier in the year. It was teenager-y, painful and physically hurt. As per my way of dealing with the situation was to research and read. I knew if I read enough on the subject a way of healing would eventually materialise, and it did. I heard a psychologist talking recently […]

How to reprogramme your brain…

If you are lonely when you are alone then you are in bad company. Jean Paul Sartre I’ve had a boyfriend since I was 16, with very limited periods of singledom/doom inbetween and from the age of 14 I’ve been very aware of how I am seen within the context of the male gaze. I’m […]